Busted Locals

Ya'll should review this article ... it is quite true, and when you know it backwards and forwards, ya'll will be ready to be fixinto pay a visit down where it is warm and the people are mostly warm too ... as long as you d'own stay too long if you ain't from around there (going back at least two or three or four or so generations)

WELCOME TO THE SOUTH FACTS:

1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.

2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South.

3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South, plus a couple no one's seen before.

4. If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.

5. "Onced" and "Twiced" are words.

6. "Jawl-P?" means, Did you all go to the bathroom?

7. People actually grow, eat and like okra and collards.

8. "Fixinto" is one word. It means "I'm going to do that".

9. There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there's supper.

10. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar. It is referred to as the Wine of the South.

11. "Backwards and forwards" means I know everything about you.

12. The word "jeet" is actually a question meaning, 'Did you eat?'

13. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work until you're done or it's too dark to see.

14. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH em.

15. "Ya'll" is mostly singular. "All ya'll" is always plural.

16. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect, or animal.

17. You carry jumper cables in your car - for your OWN car.

18. You only own five spices: salt, pepper, mustard, tabasco and ketchup.

19. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports, the motor sports, and gossip.

20. Everyone you meet is a: Darlin', Honey, Sugar, Baby, or Miss (first name) or Mr. (first name).

21. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.

22. You know what a hissy fit is..

23. Fried catfish is the other white meat.

24. We don't need no Driver's Ed. If our Mama says we can drive, we can drive!!!

25. NEVER dispute or say anything bad about Mama!

(I LOVE BEING SOUTHERN! COULDN'T IMAGINE IT ANY OTHER WAY!)

And that is the way it is, bless their hearts, sho nuff.